motherhood changed me.

That seems like a pretty obvious statement....

I mean, who doesn't get changed by motherhood.

I'm not talking about the typical changes. I'm talking about something more than that.

In January, when I was pregnant with H-Man...someone asked me what my plans were for the baby. What my sleeping thoughts were, what my vaccination thoughts were, what my birth plan or labor thoughts were...basically she got me thinking.

I remember so distinctly, I laughed and said "H will get ALL his shots. I'm not going to tell a doctor what to do during labor, they know. And he's going right into the crib when we get home." (I didn't even have a bassinet...) And if you had asked me right then if I wanted an epidural, you would have sold me.

Now...HA! Look at me.

Labor? My water broke, on a Monday night. Contractions started. I walked. And walked. And walked. And walked. I was on an all-liquid diet (blech) just in case I was going to need a c-section. They kept suggesting I might want to start pitocin. I answered with a quick but very polite "Nope! We're fine! Thanks!" And I really was fine. My baby was fine. I was watching the monitors. Twenty four hours passed and c-section was mentioned. "Nope! We're fine! Thanks!". Now I was in some serious pain. "Pain meds?" "Nope! We're fine! Thanks!" In the end, my little one was born...all naturally, without meds, on my own, on Wednesday. After water breaking on Monday. And he was fine. No pain meds. I did it.

Vaccinations? Well if you've read my last post you already know my stance on that.

Crib sleeping? H still sleeps with me. In bed. He goes to sleep on his schedule, I put the toddler bed side up. And hop in bed when I'm ready to. We both sleep better this way.

And to boot. I cloth diaper.

Motherhood completely changed me.

I never thought I'd be a cloth diapering, breastfeeding, babywearing, co-sleeping, naturally delivering, vaccination declining mama. Never. Ever.

And I wouldn't change it for the world.